Years ago an 18 year-old niece came to live with us. We loved her dearly but she and her divorced parents were at odds and she’d had a few rough years finishing high school.
Randy and I both come from a family of huggers and it’s standard operating procedure to greet family and friends by hugging them. Our niece, though a member of the family for all of her life, hadn’t developed the habit of hugging heartily. She would make an attempt at a hug, but it was pretty tepid. One of the first things we made an effort to do with her was tell her often how much we loved her, and give her nice, long, squeezy hugs. We encouraged her to hug us like she meant it. She was a fast learner.
There are proven health benefits attributed to hugging. Hugging builds trust and a sense of safety. They say hugging for at least 20 seconds lowers blood pressure and stress and strengthens the immune system. Studies show that hugging is the fastest way to get oxytocin (called the the love drug because it calms your nervous system and boosts your positivity) flowing in your body. Psychology Today magazine says all this works even if you hug yourself.
Make it a habit to hug people like you mean it. You both benefit!
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