In 1980, Air Force Basic Training was 6 weeks long. In 2025 it’s 7.5 weeks long. I don’t know for sure, but I think the increase in length is because they have to wean recruits from electronics and do some cultural deprogramming. Teaching a young adult today to obey orders isn’t as easy as it used to be.
When I travel down memory lane to boot camp, I can’t help thinking about the Goldie Hawn movie, Private Benjamin (which also came out in 1980). In the movie Private Benjamin claims she didn’t join “this army.” She joined the one that was more comfortable and less regimented, the one with private rooms and condos.
I was already a military wife when I joined so I knew what to expect, but most of the girls in my flight did not. One afternoon near the end of our 6 weeks we were told we’d get a town pass for Sunday if… Apparently, none of the girls heard the “if” part. There was great excitement and anticipation about an afternoon off base and on our own. Some minor infraction of the “if” clause caused the town pass to be cancelled for the whole group.
This cancellation process is, honestly, standard operating procedure. It’s part of training, learning to deal with disappointment and changing conditions. The bitching and moaning that afternoon in the “day room” (kind of like a living room for 25 people) about the unfairness of it all, and the perception that “they can’t do that to us” drove me nuts. I remember bursting in there, screaming at these children (that’s how I thought of them!). Here’s what I remember saying: “Don’t you yet understand that when you signed on the dotted line, you sold your ass to Uncle Sam and there is not a damn thing you can do about it. Basic training is a mind control game you need to learn to play and survive. Keep your head down, your mouth shut and let the game clock run out. Then you get control of most of your life back in the real Air Force.”
I felt like their mother. Who lost her temper.
Being older and obviously knowing the ins and outs of real military life afforded me a distinct advantage. The TIs (Training Instructors) didn’t ride my butt. Heck, I was older than most of them! I played the game well and didn’t have an attitude that needed much adjustment so they mostly left me alone. There was a demerit system, and I never earned a single demerit. On the days my squadron had KP duty, the TIs always found something for me to do in the dorm. I didn’t peel any potatoes in basic training.
We recruits were relatively cut off from current events during those 6 weeks, but I do remember that while in training, Mount St Helens blew her top in Washington State. It was a topic of great concern as some of the girls were from that area.
One day the TIs announced the Air Force was auditing the integrity of the ASVAB system. You might recall from last week’s post (linked here) that I’d manipulated the ASVAB test to get a job I wanted. I worried I wouldn’t be able to recreate that manipulation, and my test scores would be noticeably different. On test day I tried, again, to just answer every third question wrong on the parts I didn’t want to get good scores on. I never heard anything about inconsistent results so, apparently, I did successfully recreate my deception. I’m pretty sure demerits would have been the least of my problems if that stunt was found out.
My biggest problem was physical fitness. I’ve never been athletic, coordinated, or even interested in physical fitness, but military training (understandably) forces it on you. And there are weight standards which I struggled mightily to meet simply to enlist.
Once I got to Texas, the weight part was easy. You march (or walk) everywhere, so there’s plenty of exercise, and you’re moving ALL THE TIME. There’s simply no time to sit around and veg. There’s plenty to eat, but only at mealtimes, so no snacking. During the 5 months I was in basic training and technical school I lost about 30 pounds and felt amazing. I learned the lessons, but sadly didn’t form the life-long habits, much to my eternal despair.
Losing weight helped my fitness by not the physical portion of training. I struggled but succeeded (barely) to meet the standards for running, push-ups, and sit-ups. The obstacle course was my nemesis. If it weren’t for the obstacle course safety rules, I’d never have finished Basic Training.
There are both wet and dry obstacles on the course. I don’t remember the exact specifics, but (say) there are 12 obstacles, and you must successfully complete 9 of them to pass the course. The rules also say that if you get too wet (slippery) on the water obstacles to safely complete the dry ones, you get to skip the next obstacle and it’s credited to you. I love the water and didn’t mind falling in the water obstacles (if there’d been snakes in there I would’ve had a real problem). And being wet allowed me to get credit for a dry obstacle. In the end, I passed the course on what was basically a technicality. Whatever it takes…
The other thing I had a tiny bit of trouble with was marching, and only because I learned in kindergarten to tell my right from my left by visualizing where the piano was in the classroom (right). All my life I’ve been dogged by the split second I need to visual that damned piano when I need to distinguish my left from my right. As we were practicing marching in the parade for graduation, the TI called “column left” and I turned the wrong way. I recall her later bragging to the other TIs that she “finally got Grathen!” It wasn’t enough of a mistake to earn me a demerit, but they seemed delighted to catch me doing something wrong.
One of the proudest, most emotional days of my life was Graduation Day from Basic Training. In spite of how far ahead of the learning curve I was in basic training, it wasn’t a cake walk. I achieved a goal that was hard and important. And I was about to embark on a life-changing adventure.
P.S. I’m going to a meeting today to get educated about Bitcoin. I still don’t understand why we should think it’s any more trustworthy than regular money, which isn’t worth much more than the paper it’s printed on. But I do know that I don’t know a lot of things, so in the interest of life-long learning, I’m all ears.
P.P.S. If you’re freaking out about the crash of the stock market, stop. It’s all going to be ok. The whole financial system is smoke and mirrors and no one I know is starving. And no group of neighbors is going to have to pool their food resources to bake a cake to share as they did in The Great Depression. Just chill.
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