When you live in Southwest Florida, weather wise, winter is the most magnificent time of the year. Someone once told us that there ARE two seasons in Florida, wet season and dry season. I contend that dry season could also be called guest season because dry season in Florida coincides with winter in most of the rest of the country.
Having a lot of guests is not new for me and Randy. In fact, as most of you already know, we’ve always named our homes and tried to make them a welcoming place for friends and family to visit, relax, enjoy, and/or launch from. Our Florida home is no different, and its name, Grathen’s Last Resort, was suggested by Randy’s sister, Kristine, as she and her husband were visiting us shortly after we moved here. I wrote a blog post about it a while ago. You’ll find that post linked here.
In the last week I’ve had three people tell me (horror) stories about experiences they’ve had with guests. The identities of those three people, their guests, and the specifics of each of the horror stories they were discussing will remain secret to protect them from embarrassment. I was playing cards with two of the people at the time, and yes, there was a bit of alcohol involved. As someone would recall one incident, it seemed to trigger the memory of another incident. This went on for at least an hour, the details of each incident more outlandish than the one before.
We were incredulous at behavior people don’t even seem to be aware of or know about and how they did not even realize the things they were doing could possibly be acceptable. Through the course of the evening, while we played (appropriately) a game called Spite and Malice (I am NOT kidding) we discussed how to handle both general and specific situations and offered advice on salvaging or terminating relationships affected by adverse guest relations. We laughed a lot and at one point I said, ”Hey, we should have a Guest Test. No one gets permission to visit (or visit again) unless they pass.” We laughed like loons at that, but you know, it’s actually a pretty good idea.
As a guest, you’re not going to be subjected to a Guest Test questionnaire. But make no mistake, your behavior as a guest is always being tested, whether you know it or not.
Here are some things that will earn Great Guest points. Great Guest points entitle a guest will be welcomed back to the location in Florida where they have no-cost sleeping accommodations. In Florida, in season (winter), hotel rooms are usually more than $200 per night! The value of each item below varies by each host and each guest. Make sure to discuss these things when making arrangements for the visit so there are no misunderstandings that will strain the host/guest relationship.
- Consult with and come to a mutual agreement with your host about how long the visit will last. Ben Franklin famously said, “Guests, like fish, begin to stink after 3 days.” Randy and I, and many of my Florida friends, think 3 days is way too short a time for most of our guests. But we do all have limits. Sometimes it depends on the guest. Some of our guests are welcome for weeks (months!) at a time. Others get no more than 3 nights before I’m ready to boot them out.
- Discuss food protocol with the host. Before we moved down to Florida, we stayed with some friends of ours who live about 20 minutes from us now. The day we arrived they told us straight out that breakfast and lunch every day were on our own. We were welcome to eat anything we wanted in their home, but everyone should keep to their own schedule and do what was most comfortable for them for those meals. Then, every day we discussed dinner and made mutuals decisions on how it would be handled. That arrangement worked out well for the week we were there. Expectations were clearly defined and agreed to by both parties before there was a problem brewing. That approach is an excellent way to start a visit.
- If the guest needs to be picked up and taken to the airport, be sure the flights chosen don’t inconvenience the host’s schedule. Discuss whether or not the guest needs to rent a car. Hosts often can’t accommodate every single thing the guest wants to do on their vacation.
- Remember that while Florida visitors are on vacation, Florida hosts live here. Sometimes they’re still working and are unable to take time off just because they have guests. Be understanding and accommodating about their normal routine.
- Guests should have a budget for and an idea of what tourist activities they’re interested in. Hosts have probably been to many of the tourist spots already and may not want to spend the money or have any interest in seeing the Ford Edison Winter Estates or the Ringling Museum again (and again and again).
- Guests who plan to party hardy on their Florida vacation need to buy their own booze. They should also consider how their drunken behavior may be perceived and received by their hosts. Walking into glass patio doors or passing out by (or in) the pool is disgusting. Staying up to the wee hours and sleeping till noon while a host has a daily routine may actually erase already earned Great Guest points.
- Guests should have and use headphones for their phone, tablet, and computer video habits. It’s considered good phone etiquette and basic good manners to remove themselves to different, uninhabited, and/or a more private area to make speaker or video phone calls.
- Guests should not assume they are entitled to help themselves to anything and everything in the host’s home. A private home with no-cost sleeping accommodations aren’t VRBOs or Airbnbs you’re paying for the privilege to use. Ask permission if it’s not given upon arrival. Ask how the host would like specific situations handled. Don’t expect to be waited on. Clean up after yourself. Return everything you borrow or use. Be thoughtful and helpful.
What have I missed? What other things can we add to the list to earn Great Guest points? Put your own suggestion(s) in the comments below.
If you’re a current friend or family member, we’d love to host you here in Florida. Call us for reservations at Grathen’s Last Resort!
P.S. As a frequent host, we never expect a gift or something material in return for opening our home to you. You don’t need to buy us dinner. Just be a Great Guest and enjoy paradise for the time you’re here.
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